To fringe or not to fringe

14. Zooey Deschanel is your hero. She basically made bangs (American for a ‘fringe, what-what eh ol’ chap’)

13. Got a spot? Feeling shy? Your fringe is your new BFF, think of it as a curtain for life. Simply close it, and settle in

12. When your fringe is good it’s really really good. That massive spot on your face? Who cares! Just been dumped by the love of your life? So what! If your bangs are banging, nothing else matters.

11. It’s also your worst enemy. When fringes throw their toys out, you’ll want to shave your head and call yourself Britney

10. You’ll need to invest in a travel dry shampoo. Fringes get oily every 3.56 hours-ish. Leave it much longer and you’ll be greasier than Andre’s Material Girl days

9. Rain is your other enemy

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8. Toni & Guy offer free fringe trims. Fringe Trims will be something you mention ALL of the time

7. There’s a very good chance that Ricky Martin’s She Bangs has been in your head ever since you read point 14. Us too. Sorry for that.

6. Your fringe may become more famous than you. This is what happened to everyone’s favourite fringe, Claudia Wimklebum and XX. The only way to bag attention now is to SCARE THE CR*P OUT OF PEOPLE AND PIN IT BACK once every couple of months. Mwa ha haa ha the power…

5. It will add at least 7 minutes onto your getting ready routine

4. Blowdry it too vigorously and you will get Lego head

3. Don’t blowdry it enough and you’ll look like Lloyd Christmas

2. At some stage you will look like Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys, this is both good and bad.

1. Everyone and anyone will be jealous of your fringe. Bask in in, you have both a banging fringe, and bigger balls. Metaphorically speaking.

So, Victoria Beckham – to fringe or not to fringe? That is a question.

Gilly Ferguson