He's annoying, overrated and sapping the show of its credibility
We need to talk about Rylan Clark.
On Saturday we’ll be three weeks into the live shows of The X Factor.
Traditionally this is the time when those acts who have slipped through on luck more than talent have to ramp it up a bit, the judges start to get more serious and the designated comedy turn among the contestants starts to skate on thin ice.
Last year, it was Kitty Brucknell. The year before, Wagner (who?). The year before that, Jedward. Good grief.
Cut to 2012 and Rylan is doing an admirable job in this role.
While the other acts make do with a bit of dry ice, his performances have involved huge and complicated routines featuring up to 30 backing dancers, OTT costumes and, last week, a catwalk, pandas and a grim mash-up of club classics topped off with Gangnam Style.
To make all this work, I wonder how much rehearsal time he gets with the show’s choreographer compared to the other contestants?
How much more care and attention is given to his vital stage and camera run-through in the studio on a Friday and Saturday afternoon ahead of the live performance, compared to that of a quieter, less showy rival like Kye Sones?
Yes, OK, that booming voice announcing RYYYLAN CLAAARK! is currently one of the bits we anticipate most come showtime.
But, as the judges keep repeating like broken records, it’s a singing competition. And Rylan can’t really sing.
I’m sure he’s a nice chap, some of his comebacks to the judges’ criticism have been razor-sharp and you have to hand it to him for getting to a place where he’s being seen by 9 million people on a Saturday night.
But, while I hate to agree with Gary Barlow, as long as Rylan’s still in the running, we shouldn’t take this show nearly as seriously as ITV would like us to.
Oh, and one more thing: when he’s papped strolling about London, Rylan keeps wearing silver Ugg boots.
Silver. Ugg. Boots. Barely acceptable on a four-year-old. Serious crime against fashion on a 23-year-old man.
It’s time for him to go.
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