The star underwent the life-chaning op last month
Andrea McLean has opened up about the heartbreak of her recent hysterectomy which means she’ll never be able to have kids with her partner, Nick Feeney.
The Loose Women presenter revealed that she sobbed into her man’s arms as they imagined the baby they will never have.
Andrea, 47, underwent the life-changing operation just one month ago after a year of illness.
Speaking for the first time since the op, Andrea – who has two sons from previous relationships – told The Mirror how the full impact of her brave decision hit home just days ago, as the couple pondered what the child they will never have might have looked like.
‘I looked over at Nick and asked: ‘If we had a child what do you think it would look like?’
‘I’ve got brown eyes, as do my children, and Nick has blue eyes. I asked if he thought we would have had a blue-eyed child.
‘It was the first time I’d really thought about it and Nick looked as if to say: ‘Where the hell has that come from?’ I think it was because I knew it would never happen now.
‘We had a little moment where Nick came over and gave me a hug and said: ‘I do, I think we would have had a blue-eyed baby’.
‘I said: ‘Do you think you would have had a little boy?’ He got a little lump in his throat because he doesn’t have a son, he has two daughters.’
The star has pushed back her return to Loose Women by two weeks as she recovers from the operation.
‘It was a huge decision and although it was the best thing to do I was scared about it,’ she said.
‘I lay in bed worrying about falling of a cliff emotionally, becoming very down and depressed with feelings of loss.
‘I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, I’m really settled and content, I’ve got a lovely relationship, our kids are in a really good place and I thought what if I spoil all of this?
‘What if I become a hormonal wreck that everyone else has to pick up?’
Andrea – who has suffered from endometriosis since her 20s – also revealed the agonising pain that forced her to undergo the op.
“I was doubled up on the sofa. I was trying hot water bottles, paracetamol, Nurofen, anything I could get over the counter, but it didn’t work.
‘I had numerous scans. They found out one of my kidneys was enlarged and twisted and veins from my kidney down to my bladder had become varicose.
‘I was sitting in a corner constantly holding my stomach before going on air.’
She announced she was taking time off the ITV daytime show live on air, and says the is ‘bowled over’ by the support she has received from viewers.
‘I’ve been so bowled over at the thought of people caring,’ she said.
‘When you’re at home wearing surgical stockings in your nightie, you feel so isolated and you feel very odd things that only people who have had a hysterectomy will understand.
‘I’m trying to walk every day and earlier this week a woman tapped me on the shoulder and asked how I was doing.
‘She said: ‘It’s never the same but you’ll be fine’ and that was really nice.’