The sharpest tongue in Hollywood - only in Now!
Madge won’t make a meal of it
Madge‘s publicist claims that it’s not true and that Madonna was just having dinner with friends when Sean stopped by their table to say ‘hello’ for 10 minutes.
I knew that they couldn’t have had a three-hour dinner – Sean can’t go that long without putting a cigarette in his mouth and Madonna can’t go that long without putting Jesus Luz in hers.
Lindsay Lohan‘s taken part in a BBC documentary about child trafficking in India. In it, Lindsay says: ‘The traffickers are in the wrong because they know what they’re doing and anyone who says that they don’t know? I mean, come on.’
I, too, am a big supporter of saying, ‘I mean, come on’ as a way to punctuate any socio-political discussion. Just the other night having drinks with friends, I said: ‘Global warming? I mean, come on.’
I want to let the BBC know that I’m available to do a documentary about important world issues – as long as it involves a stay at a five-star hotel and a plane sponsored by Belvedere Vodka.
Macca’s feminine side
Paul McCartney‘s been seen doing yoga stretches on the beach while on holiday with girlfriend Nancy Shevell. Yoga has certainly kept Paul, who’s 67, in borderline amazing shape.
What I can’t figure out is why he now has the face of a middle-aged woman. When I saw the photos, I thought two lesbians had washed up on shore after jumping off Rosie O’Donnell’s gay cruise.
Gym’ll fix it
Alex Rodriguez has reportedly moved on from Kate Hudson by hooking up with ‘a gorgeous blonde’ he met at a Miami gym. I’m sick of couples meeting at the gym. It’s bad enough having to go there without watching people trying to mate. That’s what the steam room’s for. The only time I’ve got close to some action at a gym was when I took a yoga class and thought that ‘downward- facing dog’ was a buddy exercise.
Chelsea Lately is on E! at 10.30pm every weeknight.