The radio DJ has now met his birth mother and father


Heart Radio DJ Toby Anstis has spoken about how being adopted has affected his self esteem.

Though Toby and twin sister Kate enjoyed a very happy childhood, he has struggled with feelings of inadequacy.

‘When you are adopted, you never feel quite good enough,’ he says.

‘I have found relationships hard; I sometimes end up wanting to give everything to someone else because I feel I somehow wasn’t good enough to belong.’

Toby and Kate were adopted at 6 weeks told and didn’t think about tracking down their birth parents until they were in their early 20s.

They discovered that their father Giorgio was an Italian academic and their English mother Gin had got pregnant on a trip to Italy when she was a teenager.

Now they are in touch with both of them and are glad they have found out how they came into the world.

The siblings, 37, both agree that the experience brought them closer to their adoptive parents.

‘What we’ll always have is two parents who are proud of us,’ Toby tells The Observer, ‘and love us more than anything in the world.’

This week is National Adoption Week. Find out more at

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Alanna Freeman