5 reasons I'm glad Jason Orange has quit Take That


Jason Orange has told his bandmates Gary Barlow, Mark Owen and Howard Donald, that he is quitting the group and last night released a statement to explain to fans that there was no falling out and that he just didn’t want to record or promote another album.

So now this is all getting a little bit embarrassing isn’t it because what’s going to happen? Are Take That going to have to announce they’re splitting up all over again? Or will Gary, Mark and Howard just quietly cut all contact, faze us out and fade off into the distance like one of our old crap lovers?

Who knows… for now though, they say they will continue as a trio. Like Eternal or something (and look what happened to them!).

Well, here’s a bombshell: I didn’t even know Take That were still together! They only seem to crawl out of the musical woodwork when there’s a multi-million pound tour to promote.

The last song they released that I know the words to was Greatest Day in 2008. The last ‘hit’ single was Love Love three years ago which got to No15 after being used in X Men: First Class film, and they haven’t released an album in four years.

So basically Jase, was there any point in quitting because what have you been doing for the last four years anyway? I’m pretty glad he’s finally gone. Here’s why:

1) Prancing around on stage trying to recapture the blossoms of your youth when you’re 44 is all a bit embarrassing isn’t it? He’s too old to be in a boyband. Especially when you have to sing Relight My Fire all over again, as enthusiastically as you can muster while wearing those unforgiving ass-bearing chaps that even Dirrty Christina Aguilera won’t touch anymore.

2) We don’t give a shit about him. We love to love Robbie. Gary was the talent. Mark was the cute one. Howard was the hairy one. Not sure what Jason ever did…

3) He’s single and he’s in his forties. He’s got more time to find love now. And everyone needs love. His last girlfriend was Catherine Tate in 2012 and he hasn’t been seen with anyone since. We’ve heard Tinder’s quite good…

4) We don’t have to look at that goatee anymore.

5) He’s boring. He never said anything interesting. Ever.

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