Glastonbury: The only place where the gossip's dirtier than the festival loos!

The toilets are gross and don’t even think about getting a wink of sleep. But, Glastonbury, as we bid you goodbye for another year, let us count the ways we love you

1. The music. Obv.

Where else would you have a line up that includes Dizzee Rascal, the Arctic Monkeys, The actual Rolling Stones and, erm, Bruce Forsyth?

Not only that, but you can quite easily find yourself listening to people playing on dustbins and not know whether they’re an act or Glastonbury staff getting the vibe.

2. The loos

Why? Because they are a great leveller. Everyone has to pee, right? Even Glasto goers like Prince Harry and supermodels Cara Delevingne and Kate Moss.

So, I like to imagine that between Prince Harry watching MS MR at the John Peel stage and chugging down Thai noodles with girlfriend Cressida Bonas, he queued up and passed a magnum of champers in one of the Glasto loos.

The festival’s long drops are as legendary as they are stinky. Green changing room cubicles where you can see the feet and head of the person taking care of business next to you.

It’s so intimate, in fact, you can even make friends or pass the bog roll. If you like. Imagine seeing that unmistakable ginger barnet as you sat down for a royal wee?

3. Weird celeb spots

Benedict Cumberbatch rocking shorts and flip-flops (no deer stalker, sadly, but still looking Sherlocking hot), Wayne Rooney and Coleen Rooney arriving by ‘copter, Rita Ora bending Nick Grimshaw‘s ear and Prince Harry dancing around Kate Moss‘s handbag?

It can only be the all you can eat celebrity buffet that is Glastonbury. If you were playing the biggest Celebrity Bingo game in the world, you’d have a full house within five minutes.

4. Celebs (see previous point) go a little ker-azy

Anything goes at Glasto – and that includes celebs’ sanity too. If the whispers are to be believed Cara Delevingne was so desperate to catch sight of Saturday’s headliners The Rolling Stones, she scaled a pylon. Wtf?

And then there was the brilliant rumour way back in 2005 about Kate Moss getting married to Pete Doherty in the festival’s Chapel of Lost Vagueness. Did it really happen? Who knows? Kate Moss and Pete Doherty probably can’t remember either.

5. You can become a teenage dirtbag

Remember those days of staying out in the park drinking cider with your mates? Glastonbury is like that. But better.

There’s nothing like setting up a camp fire near Glastonbury‘s legendary stone circle, drinking and talking perfect nonsense with strangers who’ll feel like your best friends by dawn.

Just don’t expect to remember their names by Tuesday. Plus, you can get away without having to straighten your hair, do your make up, or shower.

And know that everyone else is doing exactly the same. Poo-ey.

6. You get major bragging rights

It’s Glastonbury. The coolest music festival IN THE WORLD. Fact. Which means that once you’ve been, every year you can bore your friends with the same stories over and over again.

We headed to this year’s Glastonbury with Gaymers Cider, the ultimate festival refreshment. For the chance for you and your mates to Get In With Gaymers to other events and festivals across the summer head to facebook.com/Gaymers.

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