Kids mark their rites of passage with… spray tans!
Meringue dresses scarring their tiny hips, diamante stilettos giving their dinky feet blisters and dance moves that would make Rihanna blush…. welcome to the wonderful world and not to mention, total voyeur fest that is My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.
But the girls in question aren’t the teenage brides, but six year old kids getting dolled up for their First Communions! Kids are treated like mini brides and their devoted families think nothing more of ensuring they’ve got a gorgeous golden hue, thanks to a quick blitz in a fake tan booth of course.
But for a community that thrives on their strict practises – including no sex before marriage and no talking back to elders – how does it justify young kids looking more like they belong at Spearmint Rhino than the local comp?
Hundreds of miles away as we prepared to gawp at yet another over the top excuse for a wedding,non-traveller Sam kicked her way down the aisle in her 20st dress to wed gypsy boyfriend Pat.
Classy wouldn’t be the first word that sprang to mind. But wait, the piece de resistance was the concealed battery packs to illuminate her garish pink meringue during the first dance.
Only at a gypsy wedding would the dressmaker bring a fire extinguisher in case the bride burst into flames.
After risking her life (quite literally) for her big day, in her even bigger dress, Sam had every right to kick up a big fat gypsy fuss as she showcased her ‘explosive’ dress to the sounds of… UB40’s Red Red Wine. Priceless!