Russell Brand is so in love it's like he's taking tips off Tom Cruise...

Oi Russell Brand, what’s occurring? I only ask ‘cos my favourite hairy celeb has gone and had what can only be described as a total Tom Cruise sofa moment. The only thing missing was Oprah Winfrey.

Russ gushed to Jonathan Ross about girlfriend Jemima Khan for the first time, ‘I really love her.’ Blimey.

Even his ex-wife Katy Perry didn’t get any public declarations of affection on this scale – I mean, Katy revealed in an interview with Vogue that he sent her a text to tell her he was divorcing her.

I’m presuming that’s about as romantic as it got between them… ahem.

And on that note, Russ, who started dating Jemima last summer, also revealed that this time round he’s going to be kind. Phew!

‘I’m going to be really kind in this relationship. I haven’t been out there trying to nail everyone,’ and continued: ‘She’s a gorgeous, beautiful woman. I’m still superficial. I’ll still only go out with top crumpet.’

And when he wasn’t telling the world about how wonderful she was he was snogging her white Alsatian dog.

Something tells me Jemima won’t be the last bit of crumpet on the planet Russ wants to tinkle with his dinkle but hey, I’m only jealous! I’m super happy for you, Russ.

 Another wedding when you’re ready please, Jemima Brand has a nice ring to it. I suppose.

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